this is my first testimonial and i was chosen to share it in cell harvest.. i post it here to share with everyone that read the blog.. it's just my personal life and how i gone through the life before and after becoming Christian.. it's a bit long.. haha but bee lee and su ying.. (of course others too) i hope u will read it fro beginning till the end.. Manndee knew it already.. enjoy!!
Before
i was a christian since young.. i followed my aunt to church because i stayed with her. after i moved to Genting when i was 10, i attended the genting church as well. but at that time, i'm going just for the sake of going because my friend ask me to, and her mum will give me a weird look as if i'm a bad child if i don't go. so i went just to avoid being asked by the uncles and aunties. i do not understand a word or meaning but everytime during worship, i'll always cry, i don't understand why. one of the uncle said, because God love me. but i still don't understand why. during secondary school, i started to keep my religion as a secret because i don't want people around me to see me as someone holy, and i felt like it's a burden to be a christian, elders in church told me cannot go out late, cannot wear short pants or skirts, cannot do this cannot do tht. so i refuse to tell everyone i'm a christian. i afraid people will say that, eh u christian cannot do this one.. i don't want to destroy the image of christians. unless in situation that couldn't avoid as in Ic or any form, i'll put my religion as christian. weirdly, whenever i have problem, i always pray to Jesus. i only pray to Him no others even though i've change my religion before.
encounter
until 18 yrs old when i came to KL, i had a water tumor in my stomach, it had been in my body since young but i do not realized it. i thought i was just growing fatter and fatter. the tumor is not dangerous unless it burst. when i found out and went to doctor, it's already 13 CM. the doctor was really surprise that it didn't burst or put me in danger. she was so shock and told me to remove it as soon as possible. what was even more shocking to her was i went to breakdance classes every week and including the day before my medical check up.. i even press it everyday to make it smaller. the doctor said it is kind of miracle that it didn't burst. i still remember before i went into the operation room, i was praying really hard. i never be that sincere in my whole life. i was telling God "please save me, please cure me." and of course He did it. even though the operation went longer than it should be but here i am, He protected me. even a doctor was surprise that it didn't burst, so who else could it be that saved my life? only God. i knew the answer and i was thankful during that moment. however, i didnt attend any church or cells.
Salvation
after a year, i met Shin Yi in my cousin's house and she invited me to CoUZ, at first, i thought since it's all college students, it will be great if i get to meet more ppl from different colleges. 2008 january, i attended the first couz night, and i had fun. the game was fun, the worship songs were upbeat and nice, the pastor was funny so i enjoyed going there. after few months, i joined Sheep united, it started to makes me think that, "it's not boring to worship, it's not boring to listen to the stories in Bible." Worship can be fun. and i accepted Christ once again in mission Trip. after seeing so many people got saved by God and how He changed their life, i felt the reason i attend couz and cell is because of God, not because of other college students.
Praise
for these two years, there are lots of changes in my life. i'm not afraid to tell other people i'm a christian, i'm not afraid to tell people that i'm not free during friday night because of cell. and i found the meaning of worshiping God, it's not just to sing according to the lyrics but to praise Him on everything he did. He sacrifice himself for someone small and imperfect. he changes my relationship with my family, he changes my thinking on certain issues. before this, i only pray to God when i have problem and blame everything if it didn't come according to my ways. now i tend to be thankful on everything i got and to think that every failure or suffer has a reason, God wanted to make me stronger. we are even closer during Couz Camp, he replied my prayers through different ways and in the end He just wants me to know that he love me. he listens to me. even though i'm not a perfect daughter, He still love me more than anyone else. that is the question in my heart, he confirm and even double confirm with me that He loves me. He sent different people to bring me back to him so that i won't get lost anymore, i thank god that He sent Shin Yi, Ciss, Melody, James to bring me back to Him, i thank God that he answered my prayer and told me he love me through different ways. i thank God that He sent Mellisa to hug me when i requested for a hug. i thank God for answering my prayers even though some of it are weird prayers to show me You are always there to listen to me. besides that, i thank God that He sent awesome people to be my best friends in my life. He knows how important these people are to me and how much they meant to me.
many people asked me why am i so lucky on this or that, now, my answer is because i got a great Father that arranged everything that is best for me.
